This year Jack’s costume is that of The Cat in the Hat. I arrived at this decision because he loves the story and always makes a big deal of pointing out the hat on all of the pages of the book.

I found the cutest costume and ordered it at the beginning of the month.

I was so excited when it arrived – I couldn’t wait for Jack to try it on.

That’s where the fun ends.

First, I took out the hat and put it on his head. What began as a surprised look of recognition quickly turned to anger as I placed it on his head.

But that didn’t stop me!

I then wrestled him into the suit, sure that if I could just get it on him and have him look in the mirror all would be fine.

I was wrong.

It actually made things worse.

He got REALLY angry.

He threw the hat on the floor while screaming “no, sir!”

It was at this point that I realized things were probably not going to get better. So, the costume came off.

We are now in the desensitization phase. Mike and I are hoping that by randomly exposing Jack to the costume at different intervals when he is happy, by the time Halloween rolls around it will be no big deal to put on the costume.

So began Phase One – wear the hat. This, (the one time we’ve tried it so far) has been a success!

It may have also helped that Mike read Jack the story of The Cat in the Hat while wearing the hat on his head and putting the costume around his neck.

Yes, my husband is awesome.

We will see what the 31^st of October brings! Will he or will he not wear the costume? Stay tuned…..

This is an actual title of a book in Jack’s classroom at school and I think it’s perfect! We’ve been having our own lessons in keeping our hands to ourselves lately.

Since his graduation to the toddler room at the beginning of August, Jack has now had issues with hitting/pushing one of his friends who is still in the infant room.

How are they still in contact? He, like us, arrives a few minutes early for school in the morning so there is a waiting period in the area outside before the doors open at 8:30.

Recently, Jack just can’t seem to control himself and pushes his little friend whenever said friend gets too close. He doesn’t do it with any of the other kids, just this little guy.

I, being a touch on the dramatic side, have called school to discuss his behavior and lament over the fact that my child is already a bully. A lengthy conversation with the director, who gave me tips on how to calmly handle the situation when it occurs, left me feeling a bit better.

I’m fairly certain that Jack isn’t a bully at this point, but rather still has problems controlling his impulses – as most toddlers his age do.  Fortunately, the friends’ parents have been awesome about the whole thing and we have been able to work together when the boys are around each other to minimize the problem.

This whole situation got me thinking about the importance of parental involvement in a child’s life both in and out of the home.

Chances are Jack would just outgrow this behavior regardless of whether or not I had intervened. But I saw this as an opportunity to teach him about proper conduct and so took action.

To me, these little lessons are important for laying a strong foundation for him to draw from when I’m not around to mediate.

Right now these kids are like sponges and they pick up on everything we say and do so leading by example is key. (And no, Jack’s father and I do not go around hitting and/or shoving people so he did not pick up this behavior from us)!

So, not to go all Whitney Houston on you, but these children ARE our future so we should teach them well so that they will be able to lead the way (and you’re welcome for getting this song stuck in your head for the remainder of the day).

Last week was a less than stellar one. Among other things, I was told, via email, that there was no time or money to continue my column that I was writing for the Columbia Patch. This was told to me after I submitted my latest article, was asked to edit it (which I did) and then was told by the editor that she was in the process of editing my revision. While I completely understand and support that there are much more important, and newsworthy items that take precedence over my article, I can’t help but feel that the dismissal that I received was a bit unprofessional. Perhaps this is the way things work in the writing world, but it’s not something that I am used to.

Why am I sharing all of this? Because, after several days of self pity and beating myself up,  I’ve decided to keep on writing anyway. I have several columns already written that I had planned to submit and since I did the work, why not submit it somewhere? Even if there are only 3 people that read this, it’s better than having these things just sit in my saved documents.

So, I’m starting with the latest article that I had submitted for my column but will not be run. I hope you enjoy it.

A Little Help From My Friends….

“Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down”.  ~ Oprah Winfrey

Luxuries like taking a shower that lasts longer than 5 minutes are a thing of the past.

Going to the bathroom on my own is no longer an option (unless I want to shut the door and listen to my child scream on the other side the entire time I am in there).

Getting dressed and doing hair in preparation for the work day could be something I could compete in at an Olympic level.

Makeup? I don’t feel it’s a necessity for my day to day so it’s been pushed to the “special events” roster.   My coworkers and the general public may not agree but fortunately for me, they don’t get a vote.

Eating a full meal while sitting at the table – I can’t even remember what that’s like. In addition to helping Jack through his meals, I now use eating as an opportunity to multi-task: putting dishes away, opening mail, preparing lunches etc.

In the midst of all of this newfound sharing of space and time every waking second of the day, it’s easy to lose one’s sense of self.

Luckily I have a husband who is a big proponent of keeping me happy so I get at least one night a month all to myself – Girls Night Out.

Sometimes it’s just one or two of us and sometimes it’s a group.

Sometimes it’s a chic flick or a local concert and sometimes we go all out and actually leave Columbia and head to Baltimore for a night of dancing.

Whatever the activity, it’s just nice to be able to get out and not be “mama” for awhile.

The thing is, it doesn’t really matter what the background setting is, it just feels good to get out and talk to other women and know they feel the same pressures I do and have the same anxieties and fears. And sometimes there isn’t even that much talking involved – it could be just as much about listening to some good music and making each other laugh with our dance moves.

Don’t get me wrong, I love my husband and son but these nights are as important to me and my sanity as a good nights’ sleep (which happens with about the same regularity).

I don’t think I ever really appreciated the importance of being able to surround myself with a good group of friends until I had Jack. I’ve made a number of moves over the years and with each one I seem to have been able to add several really great people to my circle. They, along with my wonderful husband, are the key ingredients to my being able to manage this crazy ride and for that I am thankful.

Yes – that’s what I’ve been when it comes to updating this blog. Life has taken a crazy turn and I am so busy that I just haven’t found the time. To be honest, I’ve also been in kind of a rut. I am sick and traveling for work and so am feeling a bit down about things and haven’t had any desire to write. I do hope that I will get back in the swing of things next week.

It’s so hard being away from my family. It’s funny to say, but I would give anything to hear my little boy’s voice right now – even if it was just him saying “no” to something. We try to talk on the phone but at this point he kind of just holds it and breathes. A friend recommended that we Skype but I didn’t get it together in time and so we are not doing that for this trip. I think I will definitely look into it for the future though. I need to see my little man’s smiling face.

I am at a conference and I look around at all the people here and I just don’t get a lot of them. They act like they have just been released from jail and are all about “living it up” while they are away. I can’t see myself ever feeling that way. If anything, I just sleep more than I normally would at home.

I’ve decided that I’ll take the stress of my everyday life over this existence any day of the week. While my days at home are filled with hectic schedules and permanent weariness, I also get to have smiles and hugs and the overall joy of watching my little boy grow up and have my husband come home every night.

I don’t know what has gotten into Mother Nature but – enough already!!!

We have been very fortunate in that we weren’t even aware the earthquake occurred (we were riding in the car), we escaped losing electricity as a result of Hurricane Irene and so far this week (knock on wood) we haven’t had any flooding in our house. Jack’s school has not been so lucky. We had an early pickup today due to flooding in part of the building. Things are expected to go back to normal tomorrow as far as school is concerned though so I’ve got high hopes.

While we’ve been lucky, I know that many others have not. I see the photos and watch the videos and just cannot imagine some of the hardships these people have to endure. I don’t know that I would have the strength. So when I lay my head on the pillow tonight I will again count my blessings and pray for another flood free day tomorrow.

My husband went to visit his family in NC for the Labor Day weekend so Jack and I were on our own. This isn’t the first time – in fact from the time Jack was born until he was about 10 months old, Mike had a job wherein he traveled almost every week. Regardless, every time I am in this situation, I can’t help but thank my lucky stars that I do not have to go it alone on a permanent basis.

I don’t know how single parents do it. I don’t even know how stay-at-home parents do it.

Before I had Jack I thought how nice it would be to be able to stay at home with him. By the end of my maternity leave I decided it was best for both of us that I had to go back to work.

I love my little boy to pieces but I know that our relationship is much better because we are not around each other 24/7. Some parents have the knack – in fact, my husband has stated on several occasions that he would love to stay home with Jack. More power to all of you. I know my limitations and that is one of them.

That being said, I would LOVE to be in a position where I could either work part time or at least have a more flexible schedule so that I could spend more time with him. We do have a lot of fun together and I love showing him new things and watching how his imagination works. I just couldn’t do it all the time or all on my own.

I think it takes one partner being away for a bit to help the other take a step back and realize just how much of a difference having both of you present makes. And to those of you the don’t have that luxury my hat goes off to you.

My husband will have a chance to meditate on this very experience in the near future as I am off on a business trip next week. Let the good times roll!!!